I sat at a table last night after a play reading and what came to me was that many of the people I was sitting with and the one who organized the reading had all been part of New World School of the Art. A school I graduated from WAAAAAYYYY back in the day.

So basically, I was sitting at a table of like minded artist becasue they were all put through the same training.We connected and were on the same page instantly becasue we knew where we came from. Be it good or bad…it was the same and in that there was a familiarity to us all. We all had a touchstone…a commonality of trainers that we could compare notes on and in that I realized what I had been searching for all along was here…a family. Independent of each other we are all actresses all trained at one point at the base point…alike.

I felt at home..in my way, in this really soft way. I don’t know these women very well but we are all still sisters. We were raised by the teachers and went through the same mini-dramas that built us to be exactly who we turned out to be.

IT was a great night and to remember that no matter what…I am an actress and I can never undue it.



London vs American Acting

Pretending to be a role is very different than being the role. It gets really messy when you discuss this with the acting community… because the style of off shoots of METHOD acting Have become integrated in our teachings. The teachers of today were among the first or second generation of this approach. It is imbedded and systemic…it can’t be undone…like the vine that a German guy brought to NC and it now covers all the trees and looks like a forest but it is a vine killing the forest itself…looks can be deceptive.
I went to London in 1995/6 and worked with the best teachers from RADA that we now working at Webber Douglas I was kind of like the vine…going there to learn what they were doing but in a way…starting to expose the alternative American training to these classical teachers…perhaps they saw the future…a. Bunch of emotionally unstable artists…just waiting to happen.
Here is a perfect example of how my American approach to acting was received.
I was the ONLY American actor there and they accepted me into a class of post graduate students. I was beyond thrilled and thankful.
we had midterm performances and I did a monologue that I thought was amazing. I mean I broke down on stage crying and opening up my heart. I was amazed how OPEN i way, how connected to my true self…and what happened after that was that the school threatened to kick me out.
They were very confused by what I was doing and said…”why are YOU crying? That’s not your job! That is the job of the audience!”
It was such a wakeup call. I was sitting across from an acting instructor and she was holding a tissue box and I was just crying again. Now from her critique of my amazing breakthrough movement…and she was like..
“what the hell are you doing?” That was ugly and sloppy and not professional at all”
all I see in my memory bank is a constant flow of tissues.
I am not sure I ever fully adapted their approach as my first language but it gave me structure to my work in many ways.
After they suggested I consider leaving the school I cut my emotional connections off and started making fun of the teachers ( this this was s suggestion of one of the teachers themselves) in My final showcase monologue of a high strung woman…..pretending to Steward Pierce our high strong voice teacher.
This time I was greeted with accolades…. They were fully impressed with my IMPRESSION of a character- my ability to ACT…not become…
I remember this one teacher was like do you want to know who we were all most surprised by? I was feeling like such the pathetic student I was like…no…
She smiled and said. YOU.
It was such a huge shock and wake up call.
However. I rarely see classical teaching anymore and even London theater…in their contemporary theatre seemed so become so American- talk about the tail wagging the dog.



I received the email for the rehearsal of a film that a freind asked me to do. I began to become both excited and then angry. This part of me that doesn’t want to pretend anymore started screaming and I began to act out. I got annoyed with Steve with my mom with the whole world instantly and even ruined a nice dinner by being sad. It wasn’t until I was coming home from he day in the city with my mom that I then got an email that my freind was baking out of the film.

I immediately began to consider ding the same and as soon as I sent the email saying thank you but no thank you a rush of NOT HAVING TO a relief washed over me.

I don’t think I am able to really understand how much I do not want to do something until the idea of NOT doing it comes into play. It was the same with Steve and I. I mentioned this before.

THis part of recasting is a series of instant helloboodbyes. They are about about trying and eyeing how things fit and then not making too much of a commitment and then letting go at the first opportunity. It I then feel like retuning to it…well then…it is from a place of peace and not HAVE TO but rather “Would like to” and not SHould cause I can but may because it woudl be NICE.

Moving from a place of peace is amazing and the toxity of doing something I don’t want to do feel like plugging my finger in a socket and yet…I am seeing I tend to stay there a minute or two just to see if I COULD and WOULD becasue I haven’t fully transitioned into OIGN this book which in a sense is ALL about me and not anyone else…which is the practice I am trying to do. Understanding my OWN self…more.



I miss you. I know we had a great time and I know I got worked up a bit but I’ve taken myself out of the running as far as legit work and focused more on student film. Becoming a student myself.

I was just told about another role for a film and it made me smile. The one acting teacher who actually took my class and participated in it asked me to film this with him. I am not sure yet if the director will cast me but the idea of working again made me smile.

I guess you Ae like a lover acting. I have to sometimes let you go – give us space- so we can fall in love again.

I am still interested in that CO-OP Agebcy for actors where we train and also help each other land roles.

They have models of this in the UK and I feel like I would like to connect with a few actors in Miami and build this out…as was my original idea many years ago.

I am going to ask a woman in Miami who is super kind to take my photo and start there. Why do I always say I am not going to act again? Just to keep acting interested in me?


Hello Dar

We met in High school. In science class- we clicked. Two Jewish japs in science class with no scruples. I’ll take the blame for our creative way of passing classes but in the end our canoe trip down peace river may have sealed our friendship.

We had other strong friendships that were born before and after our tenth grade meeting but the one we share is special.

While I was in NYC we spent 48 solid hours together and my visit with her this past weekend is a testament to the power of those that love you for you.

We laughed so hard I think I tore a an muscle, we wondered aimlessly back and forth trying to find Amsterdam, we ate a massive lunch with chicken and goat cheese followed by Chinese and fortune cookies and wine, we corrected ourselves the next day and ate pink berry for dinner…and mostly we laughed so hard through it all. Seeing how she sees the city is amazing. SHe walks through the streets and people smile at her..she has built community!

I love her more than anyone else and during Yoga I lost focus just staring at how beautiful she is.See….

We harbor absolutely no jealously between us. I am sure of it. I know myself and i know how easily hurt I can get when I feel the person I am speaking to has negative energy toward me or from me. But with Daria it is never the case.

I think I figured out why. Daria sees me for me and loves it all.

Daria has something I could NEVER fully attain but fully respect. SHe is sensible. She is able to take my creative inpetripations or a throught and break it down very kindly and and slowly in order for me to see where i might have lined things up wrong. It is amazing me.

One of the latest was my decision to get the lift. I had decided not to be FAKE and now a lift..was that another FAKE- SHe has small perky boob because she is the most beautiful thing ever. A tiny brunette that seemes unscathed by bearing two kids.

She talked me through the proces and we decided that having cute boobies was not fake- it was sensible…and having my mother with me during the surgery was a must.-

I took her advise and booked my surgery- nixed the implants everyone else suggested and now- I am sitting here. THankful for the sensible freind who happens to be the smartest woman i know…and not becasue she graduated from several IVY LEGAUESE…those are just happen stance…she has always been brilliant…

Funny how It took me years to really understand that although I am a creative wiz there are women in my life that understand the practical aspects of living a lot more than me and I am happy to have them by myside.

In fact if I rcecount the times I followed Daria’s advice and the times I wasn’t wise enough to…I can tell you that following her advice has never proved to be a mistake..

Maybe becasue we both believe in Marriage and family above everything and have devoted out lives to that in not an intense career..maybe her perspective is the most valuable bc our missions are the same…to love and be loved by those we love.

We tend to be traditional and both our husbands are the bread winners…this is not universal among most of my friends and that parallel is respected by each other and not looked down upon or pitted.

I could write all day about my DAR. But for now…know if she ever gives you advice…take it!