Tag: penn state

Kitchen

Hello…. Webber Douglass

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I remember being at a coffee shop in Penn State’s Happy Valley no doubt sprinkling cinnamon on my 15th refill of dark blended coffee …cozy…and their phone rang.

My roommates at the time called the coffee shop! We didn’t have cell phones so romatinic things like this could easily happen. THey called my name and I was like- huh? I think the coffee shop waiter walked over to me and said are you Susie? I was like yeah? Well, you had a call and something about a letter is waiting for you! I remember the feeling of running back to my apartment up the stairs like my heart was leading me and I saw an odd shaped THIN..very THIN….small yellowish envelope. – rectangle shape.

It was sealed with one of thoe bunny ear metal closures and I slowly opened it all it read on one paper. We are happy to …..

It was Ana amazing idea! GOIng to London to study acting!!!!!! I had trained in acting since 5th grade os this was huge becasue I really wanted to do classical Shakespeare theater for my life…never really thought logistics or how that woudl work but something about learning classical theater in LONDON well….

So- being in London was a major adjustment to my approach o acting. It basically was the opposite approach as it had an external process of developing an actor. Voice, Movement and make-up all slowly creating a character…and this tapping into your own emotional at the first step was NOT what we did.

Kitchen

London vs American Acting

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Pretending to be a role is very different than being the role. It gets really messy when you discuss this with the acting community… because the style of off shoots of METHOD acting Have become integrated in our teachings. The teachers of today were among the first or second generation of this approach. It is imbedded and systemic…it can’t be undone…like the vine that a German guy brought to NC and it now covers all the trees and looks like a forest but it is a vine killing the forest itself…looks can be deceptive.
I went to London in 1995/6 and worked with the best teachers from RADA that we now working at Webber Douglas I was kind of like the vine…going there to learn what they were doing but in a way…starting to expose the alternative American training to these classical teachers…perhaps they saw the future…a. Bunch of emotionally unstable artists…just waiting to happen.
Here is a perfect example of how my American approach to acting was received.
I was the ONLY American actor there and they accepted me into a class of post graduate students. I was beyond thrilled and thankful.
we had midterm performances and I did a monologue that I thought was amazing. I mean I broke down on stage crying and opening up my heart. I was amazed how OPEN i way, how connected to my true self…and what happened after that was that the school threatened to kick me out.
They were very confused by what I was doing and said…”why are YOU crying? That’s not your job! That is the job of the audience!”
It was such a wakeup call. I was sitting across from an acting instructor and she was holding a tissue box and I was just crying again. Now from her critique of my amazing breakthrough movement…and she was like..
“what the hell are you doing?” That was ugly and sloppy and not professional at all”
all I see in my memory bank is a constant flow of tissues.
I am not sure I ever fully adapted their approach as my first language but it gave me structure to my work in many ways.
After they suggested I consider leaving the school I cut my emotional connections off and started making fun of the teachers ( this this was s suggestion of one of the teachers themselves) in My final showcase monologue of a high strung woman…..pretending to Steward Pierce our high strong voice teacher.
This time I was greeted with accolades…. They were fully impressed with my IMPRESSION of a character- my ability to ACT…not become…
I remember this one teacher was like do you want to know who we were all most surprised by? I was feeling like such the pathetic student I was like…no…
She smiled and said. YOU.
It was such a huge shock and wake up call.
However. I rarely see classical teaching anymore and even London theater…in their contemporary theatre seemed so become so American- talk about the tail wagging the dog.

Kitchen

Not…Acting

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I received the email for the rehearsal of a film that a freind asked me to do. I began to become both excited and then angry. This part of me that doesn’t want to pretend anymore started screaming and I began to act out. I got annoyed with Steve with my mom with the whole world instantly and even ruined a nice dinner by being sad. It wasn’t until I was coming home from he day in the city with my mom that I then got an email that my freind was baking out of the film.

I immediately began to consider ding the same and as soon as I sent the email saying thank you but no thank you a rush of NOT HAVING TO a relief washed over me.

I don’t think I am able to really understand how much I do not want to do something until the idea of NOT doing it comes into play. It was the same with Steve and I. I mentioned this before.

THis part of recasting is a series of instant helloboodbyes. They are about about trying and eyeing how things fit and then not making too much of a commitment and then letting go at the first opportunity. It I then feel like retuning to it…well then…it is from a place of peace and not HAVE TO but rather “Would like to” and not SHould cause I can but may because it woudl be NICE.

Moving from a place of peace is amazing and the toxity of doing something I don’t want to do feel like plugging my finger in a socket and yet…I am seeing I tend to stay there a minute or two just to see if I COULD and WOULD becasue I haven’t fully transitioned into OIGN this book which in a sense is ALL about me and not anyone else…which is the practice I am trying to do. Understanding my OWN self…more.