Tag: play

Kitchen

Goodbye….PLAY…

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A play has always been a sad goodbye…but last night for the first time I was more happy than sad. I knew what I needed to do to maintain this feeling of connection and I was in a place to do it. I was preaching empty words…I was truly acknowledging that the reason I feel disconnected from the actors community is that I left it…as soon as the play was over as though…if I am not in a play I shouldn’t need to be around actors that much but what I have learned is that
Miami has a beautiful theater community built by the schools that are here and the feeling is super kind and loving among the actors for the most part..
It is a comrodery that is you treat it with good will it gives back to you with a truest sense of belonging but I think I felt I was…not truly among them… faker..not talented enough not consistent enough and not participatory enough…but now I see I can be more of those and I am a value and I desire to be part of this Miami World.
I have tried but I think I found a sweet spot and the right angle…just be me and do something small and take along a few kind hearted lovers and see what happens…Getting mad because I didn’t get a grant or a part is so old susie…I can just keep moving forward and doing the work and take what I get when it comes and create when I feel inspired…

Last night an old actor walked into my room while I was doing my last piece and his face was sad…no idea why just sad and it affected my piece and it was fascinating because the type of theater I am doing is truly affected by the people in the room and it is not that we are building and presenting we are offering and collaborating…

Immersive theater is amazing

s

Kitchen

Hello …crow to headstand to backbend

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This vacation I had a vision of myself dancing in the grass. Doing many things I at this moment have never done. I. Was inspired to create a combination of movement and practice it over my travels these past two weeks.

It was a cartwheel on the right then on the left a body roll then roll down into a crow then head stand hold then into back bend and GET UP.

I have not yet gotten up but through videoing myself and watching it back I was able to adjust my movement from the external eye and and I completed all the others..

I am able to get up from a mid height…like a ottoman or bed but not the floor exactly…

But this inspired me and kept my mind fluid….and gave it something to PLAY with.

I am thinking this is what the new movement work I will be studying will continue to do.

Monotony is the death of me! SKT

S

Kitchen

Not…Acting

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I received the email for the rehearsal of a film that a freind asked me to do. I began to become both excited and then angry. This part of me that doesn’t want to pretend anymore started screaming and I began to act out. I got annoyed with Steve with my mom with the whole world instantly and even ruined a nice dinner by being sad. It wasn’t until I was coming home from he day in the city with my mom that I then got an email that my freind was baking out of the film.

I immediately began to consider ding the same and as soon as I sent the email saying thank you but no thank you a rush of NOT HAVING TO a relief washed over me.

I don’t think I am able to really understand how much I do not want to do something until the idea of NOT doing it comes into play. It was the same with Steve and I. I mentioned this before.

THis part of recasting is a series of instant helloboodbyes. They are about about trying and eyeing how things fit and then not making too much of a commitment and then letting go at the first opportunity. It I then feel like retuning to it…well then…it is from a place of peace and not HAVE TO but rather “Would like to” and not SHould cause I can but may because it woudl be NICE.

Moving from a place of peace is amazing and the toxity of doing something I don’t want to do feel like plugging my finger in a socket and yet…I am seeing I tend to stay there a minute or two just to see if I COULD and WOULD becasue I haven’t fully transitioned into OIGN this book which in a sense is ALL about me and not anyone else…which is the practice I am trying to do. Understanding my OWN self…more.