letting go or putting down

Jewbana my love…we have spent a year together ..if you think about it.

a whole year…And we even went to Europe together and it was amazing and you were amazing… you ARE amazing…and when we came home I showed you to my city to people who would really get you and you KILLED it it was amazing… and I am so proud of us…all of us…

I am concerned though…to be honest …in how to maintain our relationship…back home with all the distractions and my desire to evolve to move run away..

I am going to set you down..a moment to breath – to have you relax to see what the universe says to me…I am going to trust that I can approach you from another direction and in order to do that I have to move away a bit.

I see your name on sweat shirts…I see it…I see your name on t-shirts that have quotes from you -I see your name around town- and then MAYBE I see us getting back on stage together…on a screen- on a pole – I wish I had a person to be responsible for…I have a space now as thought that will keep me interested…in you in us…momentum…it is a BITCH…

I know you are amazing..I will POST your story so people can buy you and read you and watch you and wear you..

I just don’t have the energy to produce you right now…at this moment… Once in Sept and once is October…..not bad…my Dear and two calls from the JCC and a call from the Shandrel RIvers theater….but…

I am tired and awaiting a call about how my Thyroid is working with Iodine and I want to tend to MYSELF now and my family. I had to take a radioactive pill for them to see how I use Iodine.. so i need to tend to me a moment…

I adore you..I am so proud of us and all we have accomplished…I just have to give myself a little breathing room..

You have given me a voice and I appreciate that gift.. you also gave me the knowledge that I can do a one woman show and in that I am blessed

(checking email for some reason)

I just got an email from Shandrel Rivers theater about a run there… and yes there are others that want to see you…I am going to chat with them but I am TIRED…not sleepy tired but trying to see what the next goal would be….

I know you land

I know you get audiences..

Should I try and build that up?

Maybe I need to pitch you as a show to Netflix or Disney or amazon..???

Maybe i need to produce the pilot?

You ask a great deal of me…JEWBANA…

but I asked more from you and you delivered so I get it…

I love you.. let’s take some space as these emails come in as I continue to rehearse you at my old High school as I buy sweatshirts for samples of merchandise I see your name on…it is returning……. you are so like me…girl…chillax…and enjoy the two minutes of it…. try.